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Self Improvement September

As part of my Self Improvement September project, I am going to take another crack at this whole blogging things. I mean, I’m a decent writer, I have ok ideas, and I’m freakin hilarious. This shouldn’t be that hard, right?…Right?? We’ll see how it goes. So far this month, I have completed 3 of the 10 books I need to read by the end of the month to meet my personal goal. This may seem like I’m behind, but I have the tendency to get knee deep in about 3 or 4 books at a time, so for me I’m on track. My whole purpose for labeling the month “Self Improvement” was solely to help me motivate myself to continue to pursue my passions and not let life distract me as it always does. This month I have also promised myself a few other things.

  1. Stay on track with my workouts. (Currently sidelined by and explainable ankle injury, but I will bounce back!)
  2. Watch my mouth! :0 & I don’t just mean those terrible words I tend to use too frequently, but everything that comes out of it. Attempt to be more positive/uplifting/compassionate etc.
  3. Cook more!….It’s not that I detest cooking, I just don’t really enjoy it. So I’ve been trying to stay out of the drive thru & in the kitchen.

I look forward to using this blog to, if nothing else, track and gauge my own personal progress. Although September is half over, it’s never too late to get on the self improvement train. We all have room to grow and learn! Go out there & do something that you feel will make your life better and/or make you a better person.

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…but I’m tired

My go to excuse. This is my favorite line, that I use way too frequently. After dealing with the stresses of the child welfare system all day, and wondering what I could’ve done better or if I’ll ever actually help a family come back together, I just want to come home and sit. That’s right, I just want to sit on my couch and not move. I am emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted, and some mindless television and wine sounds like heaven. Then I remember that I go to school full-time, and the side project I’ve been brainstorming, and all the crafting I want to do, and I just, well, get even more tired. So I sit. And I eat. And I binge for a couple hours on Netflix. Then I go to sleep telling myself I’ll do better tomorrow, but tomorrow comes and the cycle repeats itself. My sink continues to pile higher and higher with unwashed dishes, and let’s not even talk about the status of my laundry. Every day I dump it on my bed telling myself I’m going to fold it that evening, and every evening it gets pushed back into the laundry basket unfolded. Today is going to be different though, today I washed my dishes after finishing at the gym. Baby steps. Today I promise myself I will work on school or crafting after work. (With Netflix playing in the background and probably a glass of wine. Baby steps.) Today I will do better, instead just saying I will.

 

“You gotta have a vision, a vision for what is it is you really truly want. A vision is about what you’re here to create. A vision that really works, is one that excites you.”

25.

“You’ll be fine. You’re 25. Feeling [unsure] and lost is part of your path. Don’t avoid it. See what those feelings are showing you and use it. Take a breath. You’ll be okay. Even if you don’t feel okay all the time.”-Louis C.K.

This quote may be one of the most fitting ones I’ve found for my current spot in life, because I am definitely lost (most of the time just figuratively, but literally at times as well, more often than I’d like to admit) and I definitely don’t feel okay all the time.Like many people, I have multiple passions and interests, a job I some days enjoy, and others loathe, and the desire to establish what I want the overall vision for my life to be.

So here is my attempt at organizing my thoughts, and getting others’ perspectives. Although some will argue, a blog should have a focus and a reoccurring theme or topic, like my life, there isn’t really an overarching theme that comes to my mind. Will it include some things about fitness? Most definitely. Will it include some posts about crafting? Most likely. Will it include posts about quantum field theories? Absolutely not. (I actually just googled “complicated math topics” to come up with that, I have no idea what it means).

Some day perhaps, the focus of my writing and maybe even life, will become clear. As of right now though, I’m a single, twenty-something, living in a small, slightly safety compromised downtown apartment, working a stressful job, going to school full-time for a second bachelor’s degree, while trying to maintain a social life and my sanity, so this blog couldn’t be more chaotic than my real life if I tried.

 

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